Chances are, you’ve been probed over and over again at various points in your life by those who knew no better themselves: “What do you want to be when you grow up?” For most of us, it’s a question we face far too early in our lives. We either don’t have an answer, or if we did, our current reality is often far removed from what we imagined. For me, however, the answer was a spark of certainty and excitement from a young age: I wanted to go into animation; there were no second thoughts about it.

I remember Saturdays with my dad, who would wake me up early at 7:45 am so I wouldn’t miss the two-hour cartoon marathon. I was captivated by the colorful, playful worlds of cartoons like Mighty Ducks, PB&J Otter, and Marsupilami. I knew I wanted to create that magic for the rest of my life, and I started by drawing Pokémon and Dragon Ball Z characters from tazos that came out of chip packets. I would spend the little change I had, often on flavors of chips I despised, just to collect those tazos.

However, as is often the case, things didn't quite turn out as I had hoped. Coming from a family that lived month-to-month, with my parents working simple jobs, and being from an Indian community where STEM careers are highly encouraged, I pursued a degree in engineering over my desire to attend animation school instead. There were no career prospects in South Africa in the arts, they said (and they were probably right), so I begrudgingly accepted this decision based on the advice of those who partly funded my education from the temple. But the dream of that 9-year-old still lingered on, two degrees, three continents, and fifteen years on from that moment. The material success of my corporate career, earning a six-figure salary in the UK just past the age of 30, did at times drown out the unrelenting voice of that childhood dreamer within me, but just not permanently. I knew I could never fully let go of the joy that arose from my self-expression through this artform.

Over the years, corporate life commenced, and being a people pleaser I allowed the voices of those close to me, who never quite understood my passion, to convince me to leave my childhood dreams in the back seat. It was well-intentioned but it was insinuated that I had a far greater potential than simply "shooting around with a camera." Despite these misaligned expectations, I looked up to them and assumed they must be right, right? After such interactions, I distinctly remember feeling a sense of shame whenever I held a camera, even though the heart yearned to be led down this path that invigorated the soul. At the time, I couldn't make sense of it. I lacked the maturity to understand that nobody should have to feel guilty for following their calling. We do not go around choosing it and so what fault could there be of our own in the matter? Oh and not to mention that it would not be called a calling had we chosen it.

Despite these mental challenges known only to myself, I kept alive that lingering spark for visual storytelling. In 2017, I bought a second-hand camera from eBay with my savings left over after funding my dad’s cancer operation. Amidst the turbulence of giving my passions a front seat and then a back seat due to self-doubt, that was perhaps one of the best investments I made in myself. My camera became a tool not only to create colorful and nostalgic memories but, more importantly, it gave life to that childhood dreamer within me, longing to be given a voice. The imagery I made with my camera became both the catalyst and spark for my unadulterated self-expression. Creating with my camera now feels liberating; it allows me to lose sense of the burdens of life  and the expectations of those around me that can sometimes weigh the self down. Little did I know that they were right: I did have a far greater potential than just "shooting around with a camera", but it is only through picking one up that it would be unleashed. Through photography, I have unearthed my other passions for writing, film making and speaking about lessons I've learnt from my life and from the teachings of my Gurus - the giants on whose shoulders I strive to stand.

My camera is now a constant companion, always by my side. I no longer feel ashamed for holding it, instead, I wear it with pride. Rather than an act of self-defiance, it is a steadfast reminder to never let anyone extinguish the fire of that childhood dreamer ever again. It symbolizes my purpose in life: to inspire others to pursue their passions, which I believe are inevitably conduits to fulfilling one's true purpose.

As Viktor Frankl puts it, “What is to give light must endure burning.” How fitting that through a tool centered on light, I can now illuminate my own struggles, with the hope of inspiring those who share them.

Please feel free to get in touch via the Contact page if my work and story resonate with you and your brand. I look forward to crafting meaningful connections and being given the privilege to be a part of your journey. If you're interested in following mine then please do consider subscribing to my newsletter. There, I hope to share inspiring stories behind my photos, my creative process as well as updates on new endeavours.